Photography Erica Westley
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I’m writing this while flying over 5,000 feet, just after repeating to myself, “Just because you’re leaving, doesn’t mean you’ve failed”.
Claiming that I love New York City would be a redundant understatement, which is why it’s so difficult to say that I’m taking a bit of a hiatus and heading back to my hometown in Alabama for a while. Although it’s just a hiatus it’s still difficult to leave the city of your dreams for an extended period of time.
Now, let’s back up some.
As soon as September arrived, I was tested with obstacle after another— from a dislocated knee to a toxic relationship to apartment issues and more. I’ve always tried my best be a stubborn fighter, but there comes a time when you have to just take a break and step back from some of the craziness. Luckily, I have MILLIONS of blessing to outweigh those tough times, including a super-welcoming family back in Alabama! Nonetheless, I knew it was time for a little escape.
I have always been shy and hesitant to step out of my comfort zone, so I felt like going back would cause me to feel stuck in an easy routine. Compared to New York, my hometown was small in population, the cost of living was a fraction, and the overall pace is slow. It’s difficult not to feel comfortable.
However, I quickly reminded myself of the reason I moved — to break away from that life.
As a matter of fact, the reason I was so quick to move after college was the fear of getting too comfortable. Sure, there’s absolutely NOTHING wrong with wanting and loving that life. It’s 100% fabulous if you want that life ― but if it’s not for you, then it’s not for you. So it doesn’t matter how used to that suburban, Southern living I am, it’s simply not me!
Just because you feel comfortable in a place doesn’t mean it’s right for you. Actually, what is least comfortable is often whats going to benefit you in the long run.
Likewise, just because you’re taking an extended break doesn’t mean you’ve given up, in fact, it means you value your self-care and mental health more than pushing yourself to an unhealthy limit — which is what was happening to me and can easily happen in a not-so-comfortable city. I’m excited about this much-needed break, but I’m more than ready to eventually hop back out of that all-too-familiar place and slay in the city where I’m meant to be in!